“All those moments will be lost in time… like tears in rain.”
– Roy Batty
Why I created this blog
I am an avid, hopeless and unrepentant fan of film and television. I consume media as others do snacks. If I’m not watching, I’m talking about it, writing scripts or, as in this case, critiquing it. This blog is my space to do just that; write reviews of the films I love, criticise those I detest and mourn cinematic heroes lost. My hope is that you will find my articles interesting, inspiring, challenging or just plain infuriating. Whichever it is, leave a comment and let me know what you think.
Blog archive
Essentialist of… End of the World Movies – Aliens
Whether they are scuttling lizard creatures or building-sized behemoth’s, we do seem to love a bit of planet-wide doom by alien invasion.
Essentialist of… Unusual Christmas Movies
Christmas movies lay it on a bit thick for a curmudgeonly misanthrope like me. Here is an #Essentialist of some of my least hated films set in the festive season.
Essentialist of… End of the World Movies – Comedy
End of the World Movies – Comedy lists some great films that approach the apocalypse with a wry smile, a bittersweet tear or a nihilistic gut laugh.
Essentialist of… End of the World Movies – Disaster
With the possibility of apocalypse by contagion so prominent in everyone’s minds right now, I thought it might be timely to offer up an essentialist series that delved into films about the end of the the world. However, the big…
Essentialist of… End of the World Movies – Disease
This is the first in a series of posts which will cover the Earth’s impending or past doom by disease, aliens and disaster, whether they be classic, animated or comedy.
The Essentialist of…Documentaries on Netflix
The documentary comes alive as interviewees tell of apartment parties huddled around a VCR, enjoying in a state of awe the illicit pleasure of watching Chuck Norris chew a rat to death.
‘Til all are one – How in 1986 Transformers The Movie murdered my friends, and it was brilliant. To my fellow victims – ‘bah weep grannagh wheep ninibong’
While the television series had breathed life into all of those characters, the film killed most of them off. And I loved it.
Star Trek Beyond – Where The Frontier Pushes Back
Star Trek returns to its roots; exploring strange new worlds and discovering new civilisations, before inevitably getting into a massive battle with them.
Why didn’t Harrison Ford keep running? On how Han Solo was a coward, and yet we loved him for it, to the very end.
It’s no wonder that he made the Kessell Run in less than twelve parsecs, he was probably running for his life at the time.
Why has Leonardo DiCaprio NEVER won an Oscar? Because he has never deserved one. So what, the Academy Awards are shit
As each awards season rolls around, so begins the bleating of Leonardo DiCaprio groupies at the injustice of the Academy ‘not giving Leo his Oscar’. I’m sorry, but he has never deserved one.
Tusk – How Kevin Smith Kind Of Made Walrus Horror Work
Even completely transformed, with bulbous flesh and surgical augmentations, you can see Justin Long’s little face at the centre of it, screaming in horror. It’s really him in there, and it actually is kind of terrifying.
On the Passing of Terry Pratchett
‘I AM DEATH, NOT TAXES. I COME ONLY ONCE.’ – Feet of Clay.
Thank you, Terry Pratchett, for teaching me that satire and social commentary could be so compelling and so consistently, ridiculously funny.
Jodorowsky’s Dune – the Inspirational Documentary of a Tragically Doomed, Surrealist Dune
Follow Alejandro Jodorowsky as he assembled an outrageously impressive group of collaborators, ranging from HR Giger to Pink Floyd and Salvador Dali, and they began to build what many have called ‘the greatest science fiction film never made’.
A Halloween Horror Selection
Evil viscerally, audibly permeates every beam, forcing its way into reality as Ash sacrifices his sanity to counter the malevolent force. But who needs sanity when you have a chainsaw attached to your arm-stump?
Peter O’Toole – An Obituary
With performances such as TE Lawrence and Jeffrey Bernard, and such a wealth of stories of his drunken excesses, he will remain an unforgettable figure. The last of the great screen hellraisers of the 60’s has died.
Some Are Born To Sweet Delight – Dead Man
In the end, Blake ties his fate to his gun, fulfilling Nobody’s portentous statement, ‘That weapon will replace your tongue. You will learn to speak through it. And your poetry will now be written in blood.’